From Publishers WeeklyElgin ( The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense ) offers a counter to Deborah Tannen's You Just Don't Understand . Elgin argues that men and women, in fact, speak the same language and can successfully communicate with one another in the workplace, family and intimate relationships. Though she agrees that men and women perceive the world differently, she sees language and communication as a way to bridge those differences rather than as the greatest barrier. Structured around her "Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense" system, this volume demonstrates how to tackle various situations in which men and women often end up in verbal conflict. Each chapter includes a narrative conflict case study, analysis, discussion of communication techniques and review of the original case. The issues Elgin traces out are very up-to-date (two-career-family problems, sexual harassment), her advice is straightforward and clear and the techniques seem smart and reasonable. Though, as she admits, her system assumes quite a bit of cultural homogeneity, it offers a practical and useful guide for treading the minefield of communication between men and women. BOMC, QPB and Fortune Book Club selections; author tour. Copyright 1993 Reed Business Information, Inc. For doing verbal battle with the opposite sex, this is the book I'd want to have by my side. I found the audio of Suzette Haden Elgin's first book, The Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense, exceedingly useful in countering everyday conversational barbs; this book is even better, turning the focus to the gender arena. It's amazing how easy it is to fall into conversation traps rooted in differences between men's and women's perceptions of the world. The example dialogs given here will hit you where you live, especially for women who find themselves feeling trapped or misunderstood in exchanges with men. All of us can use these techniques to defuse and avoid verbal minefields, on the job-and everywhere else. -- From The WomanSource Catalog : Tools for Connecting the Community for Women; review by Ilene RosoffFrom the PublisherThe author applies proven techniques (based upon solid linguistic science and tested thoroughly over two decades) to the misunderstandings and conflicts that can arise between the sexes. Effectively demonstrates how men and women can take control of any verbal confrontation in both their personal and professional life by providing practical solutions to the male/female communication crisis. what are the best free books on kindle Genderspeak: Men, Women, and the Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful. How to communicate without being bullied or sucked into stupid arguments. Really works!By HRAmazing book.... how to communicate and be politely assertive and not get bullied or sucked into arguments. The author has several books in the series, all the same message with various examples and situations. Her sci fi writing is excellent too, worth checking out if you are so inclined. It does take some practice to actually make the techniques work. Worth it! I also recommend Peacetalk 101, sadly out of print. Transformative book.0 of 0 people found the following review helpful. I found I was a bit disappointed. It's not that the ideas are bad necessarilyBy Denise MaGeeI got this book at the recommendation of someone that I admire. Unfortunately, I found I was a bit disappointed. It's not that the ideas are bad necessarily, but just that I've read other books that are more about diffusing situations than 'defending' yourself. This could be a jumping of point, but shouldn't be the end of the road in understanding how to communicate well with others.4 of 4 people found the following review helpful. A little difficult to practiceBy GraceThis is a good book, but it is a lot of work to practice in real life. I have learned from it that there are different levels of verbal abuse and how to handle them. I was amazed to read the examples in this book and see that this IS verbal abuse.....there are much worse situations that I have dealt with ...and this book doesn't cover those severe situations! I would recommend this book however as it has helped me already! Easy reading.