About the AuthorDr. Gary Chapman is the author of the best-selling 'The Five Love Languages' (more than 4 million copies sold) and The Four Seasons of Marriage. He is the director of Marriage and Family Life Consultants, Inc.; an internationally known speaker; and the host of A Love Language Minute, a syndicated radio program heard on more than 100 stations across North America. He and his wife, Karolyn, live in North Carolina.From AudioFileMaurice Englands slight Southern accent is pleasing to the ear as he delivers Chapmans discussion of how to negotiate change in your spouse, using a Christian perspective. The book is divided into three sections, and Matthew 7:8, about the speck in your brothers eye versus the plank in your own, serves as the foundation. With an empathetic tone, England explains Chapmans three-step process for overcoming bad habits: personal examination, admitting the problem, and asking your spouse for forgiveness for past failures. Chapman emphasizes the importance of timing and of learning to speak your spouses love language to encourage negotiation and change without arguments, blame, or manipulation. G.D.W. AudioFile 2007, Portland, Maine-- Copyright AudioFile, Portland, Maine is goodreads free to read books Home Improvements: The Chapman Guide to Negotiating Change with Your Spouse (Chapman Guides)
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful. BookBy Jen2LI have not been disappointed w/any of Gary Chapman's books. Great reads, great knowledge.0 of 0 people found the following review helpful. I was way offBy SandyThis book was very educational for me. I can actually say I have most of these concerns in my marriage but my way of fixing them was way different then this book but not one of them have worked. I am definitely going to try the approaches Mr. Chapman mentions in this book. Short read; enjoy7 of 9 people found the following review helpful. This is a quick, tight read --- perfect for brushing up on your marriage, even if it's already shining.By FaithfulReader.comCouples resort to using manipulation within a marriage for one reason: it works! But anyone who has been married for very long will tell you that manipulation is a muddy foundation for any relationship --- it's messy and unstable. Are there other ways to get a spouse to change? Gary Chapman, author of the bestselling THE FOUR SEASONS OF MARRIAGES, believes that there are more effective, long-lasting and loving ways to negotiate change with those you love.HOME IMPROVEMENTS, the latest addition in The Chapman Guide series, provides a practical, down-to-earth blueprint for building a solid foundation for a healthy marriage.Why is the desire for spousal change so universal and yet the reality of real, lasting change so rarely experienced? Chapman believes that most couples are starting at the wrong place, failing to understand the power of love and lacking the skills to effectively communicate the desire for a spouse to change.Real change begins by changing yourself and not waiting for your spouse to make the first change. Chapman prescribes looking for the "plank in your own eye" and assessing your own weaknesses and failures in the relationship. He even goes so far as to encourage asking for outside help from close friends and family members and listening to their observations about your marriage. No doubt some of the comments will sting, but, if used prayerfully, they can help you begin to recognize areas that you need to work on.What about the change in your spouse? That starts only after you've begun to strengthen the foundation of love in your marriage by learning to speak your spouse's love languages. Chapman draws from his bestselling book, THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES, to encourage readers to fill up their spouse's love tank through words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, quality time and physical touch.Now down to the nitty-gritty: When you deliver a request for change to your spouse, sandwich it with compliments and remember that even the most minute movement toward change should be applauded. At the same time, it's important to keep in mind that some things will never change, and that the real change is going to have to come from you. Chapman shares a personal story from his own marriage. His wife has a tendency to leave cabinet doors open. After asking her to close them for months and growing more frustrated with the lack of response, the couple's child fell on an open drawer and cut herself. Chapman thought the incident would compel his wife to finally begin closing the drawers. Two months later, it finally dawned on him: she was never going to close drawers! Chapman says he was faced with a choice: be miserable every time he saw an open drawer, or accept this as something that will never change and close the drawers himself. He wisely chose the latter, recognizing that such a simple activity only takes a second a day.Such down-to-earth wisdom and advice line the pages of HOME IMPROVEMENTS. This is a quick, tight read --- perfect for brushing up on your marriage, even if it's already shining. --- Reviewed by Margaret Oines