Waters comes off as a thoughtful parenting realistsupporting her ideas with a mix of parental anecdotes and pointers to psychological research. Publishers Weekly As parents, we often obsess about fixing our childrens weaknesses and neglect the importance of developing their strengths. This book is full of concrete ideas on how to change that. Adam Grant, PhD, New York Timesbestselling author of Originals and Give and Take "Practical tips for parents from the wise and wonderful Lea Waters! So many parents, including me, struggle to translate scientific research into real-world strategies. This terrific book not only helps us understand ourselves and our children better but also makes that understanding actionable!" Angela Duckworth, PhD, author of theNew York TimesbestsellerGrit The Strength Switch gives parents hope that they can build their childrens creativity. By sharing parts of her own story of overcoming hardship, and presenting the latest science of positive psychology, Dr. Waters not only inspires parents to bring out the best in their children, but she inspires us all to be the best version of ourselves. A wise and warm book! Scott Barry Kaufman, PhD, co-author of Wired to Create: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Creative Mind Lea Waters points to a needed shift in the way we are parenting our children and teenagers. The Strength Switch rejects the current fad that drowns children in self-esteem and replaces it with research-based practices to help parents identify and develop their childrens best qualities. Inspiring and timely. Robert Biswas-Diener, PhD, author of The Upside of Your Dark Side This book will help you do something groundbreaking for your childrenshift your view to see their best and help them develop their unique strengths. Follow the wisdom here and you will bring deep, lasting benefit to not only your child but yourself. Thanks to Dr. Lea Waters, strengths-based parenting has arrived! Ryan M. Niemiec, PsyD, author of Character Strengths Interventions Lea Waterss expertise, hope, and heart shine through the pages of The Strength Switch. She deftly draws on the science of positive emotions to help readers appreciate the vital role positivity plays in moving through hard times. This book will be a game-changer for unlocking your childs potential. Barbara L. Fredrickson, PhD, author of Positivity and Love 2.0About the AuthorLea Waters, Ph.D., is President of the International Positive Psychology Association and the Gerry Higgins Chair in Positive Psychology at the University of Melbourne, Australia. She holds an affiliate position with Cambridge Universitys Well-being Institute (UK) and the Center for Positive Organizations at the University of Michigan (USA). Waters was the Founding Director of the Centre for Positive Psychology at the University of Melbourne and was listed in the Top 100 Women of Influence by The Australian Financial in 2015. She has also served as a consultant to a wide range of businesses. Waters lives in Melbourne, Australia, with her husband, Matthew Scholes; her son, Nicholas; and her daughter, Emily.Excerpt. Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.Martin Seligman is widely known as a leading authority on positive psychology, a branch of psychology that scientifically studies how positive emotions, strengths, and virtues help us thrive. I had met Marty when he came to Australia to establish a positive psychology approach at a school near the University of Melbourne, where I work. I had just transferred to the Melbourne Graduate School of Education from the School of Business and Economics, where as an organizational psychologist Id been studying and consulting for organizations on integrating positive psychology into the workplace, particularly on how focusing on strengths as opposed to weaknesses could improve performance. Basically, Id swapped offices for classrooms, senior execs for teachers, and workers for school kids. I was also leading the establishment of our Centre for Positive Psychology, a dedicated facility that was a first for Australia, for the university, and for me. Marty and I were talking about how effective school systems could be for introducing positive psychology to children so kids could do better in school, feel better about themselves, and become adults who will shape a society empowered by positive psychology. But as a psychologist and parent of two children, I knew that, in the infinite ways parents connect with children every day, families are by far the most powerful positive psychology delivery system of all. The question was how to reach them. Our conversation went something like this: Me: Its great that were doing this in schools. But what happens when kids go home? Im using a strength-based approach with my kids, and Ive seen the benefits. Someone should do the research that would inform parents about this. Marty: Why dont you do it? Me: But Im an organizational psychologist, not a parenting expert. Marty: Youre raising your children this way, youre a qualified psychologist, and youre working with kids in schools. So why not you? I think thats when I suddenly noticed that my wineglass needed a refill! Despite initially avoiding Martys question, it followed me all the way home on the thirty-hour flight to Melbourne: Why not me? Maybe I could do it. Maybe I should do it. If I do it, Ill be helping a lot of parents and kids. By the time the plane landed, I knew that bringing strength principles into families lives was something I had to do. Parents: 24/ 7 CEOs of Our Kids Lives These days I run strength-based workshops for schools, workplaces, and parents around the world. Ive found that no matter what country, continent, or culture theyre from, two things unite all parents: the desire to help their children flourish and a sense of inadequacy for this task. Parenting can feel overwhelming. Were the CEOs of our childrens lives, responsible for all the different departments: cognitive, physical, social, emotional, moral, sexual, spiritual, cultural, and educational. The buck starts and stops with us. Parents today have a lot more to worry about. My parents didnt have to think about screen time, cyberbullying, or sexting. Expectations of parents are growing, too. Were raising kids in an era ruthlessly focused on grades, college admission, earning potential, and social acceptance. There also seems to be less and less consensusand more scrutinyon the right way to parent. Were bombarded by conflicting approaches to raising good, successful kids. It can lead to anxiety about whether were doing whats best for our child. We may feel so pressured to help our children grow into the person society says they should be that we may not be allowing them to grow into the person they actually are. I know these pressures well. It takes all my confidence to tell other parents that I would rather let Nick and Emily play than provide them extra academic tutoring to pump up their grades. Am I putting them at a disadvantage? While there are more opportunities like this than ever for our children, they come with more competition and incessant chatter about how to help our child get ahead. How do we know what is the best approach? Based on my psychological research on well-being; my work with schools, workplaces, and parents; and my own experience as a parent I think the best approach is one that supports your childs ability for self-development, so that over time your child has the tools to take on the mantle of CEO. This approach is rooted in positive psychology and provides a child with two vital psychological tools: 1. Optimism: the force that motivates your child to create a positive future for herself 2. Resilience: your childs capacity to bounce back when life throws a curve ball You may be thinking, That sounds great in theory, but how do I help my child acquire and use these tools? Why Focusing on Strengths Makes Sense Today Our quest to define and live the good life goes back to the ancient philosophers, but only in recent decades have we started examining the question scientifically. The strength-based approach gives us the power to live the good life by drawing on our most abundant inner resources. When we use it with our children, they internalize the idea that they have strengths, and they learn to use them to take charge of their life. Why, then, do we tend to focus on the negative? As many parents confide to me: I love my kid, but I keep criticizing him. Whats going on? I have two words for you: old wiring. Our brains were shaped by the rigors of survival into becoming brilliant pattern detectors. For most of our evolution, weve survived by quickly alerting to disruptions in the patterns of daily life as clues to possible danger or to weaknesses that put us at a disadvantage: That unusual movement in the grass might be a lurking predator . . . That one unsmiling face around the tribal campfire might be an enemy . . . Our inability to run as fast as the others might mean well be left behind when fleeing danger . . . and so on. This primeval tendency to zoom in on whats off helped us size up our chances for survival and decide whether our world might be about to turn upside-down. This negative bias can be hugely helpful when your lifes at stake. But most of us dont face such extremes. For the situations we encounter todaywhich usually demand complex reasoning and problem solving, sophisticated cooperation and communication, reserves of persistence, or expert facility in a specific skillthe negative bias can put us at a disadvantage because it blinds us to opportunities, keeps us from seeing the larger picture, and bars access to the expansive thinking that unlocks innovation, collaboration, adaptability, growth, success, and fulfillment. Attention on the negative helped us survive. Attention on the positive helps us thrive. Three decades of research clearly shows the advantages of taking a strength-based approach for children and adults alike, including: *greater levels of happiness and engagement at school*smoother transitions from kindergarten to elementary school and from elementary to middle school*higher levels of academic achievement (as found in high school and college students)* greater levels of happiness at work*greater likelihood of staying at work*better work performance*greater likelihood of staying married and being happy in your marriage*higher levels of physical fitness and of engaging in healthy behaviors (e.g., healthy eating, visiting the doctor)*better recovery after illness*increased levels of life satisfaction and self-esteem*reduced risk of depression*enhanced ability to cope with stress and adversity is downloading pdf books illegal The Strength Switch: How The New Science of Strength-Based Parenting Can Help Your Child and Your Teen to Flourish
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful. Five StarsBy BrijasbreGreat Book on Strengths!!13 of 15 people found the following review helpful. Positive psychology for parentingBy Just MeThis is one of the most important parenting books that I have encountered. It takes many of the recent findings from positive psychology and applies them to parenting.At the time I am writing this review, there is no look inside feature available for this book, so I will list the chapters and their subheadings to give you a feel for the contents.CH 1: Standing for Strength in a World Obsessed with Weakness Parents: 24/7 CEOs of our kids lives; Strength-based parenting: the antidote to parent overwhelm; Why focusing on strengths makes sense today; So, what exactly is strength-based parenting?; How I developed strength-based parenting; How to use this book; Exercises: how strength-based are you as a parent?;CH 2: The Strength Switch Why it can be challenging to shift to strength; The four negative defaults; But we can override our negative defaults; Introducing the strength switch: your tool for short-circuiting negative thoughts; Tips for getting startedCH 3: Understanding Strengths Strengths can be skills, abilities, interests, characteristics, traits, or talents; The 3 key elements of a strength; Seeing strengths in your child: the 3 questions; Additional clues to your childs strengths; How strong is the strength?; Nature and nurture: where strengths come from; My formula for strength developmentCH 4: The Ages and Stages of Strength Growth How and when strengths develop; Spotlight on 8 strengths; How to encourage strength development as your child matures; The 4 key strength-based parenting strategies; You, too, can bloomCH 5: Attention, Savoring, Gratitude, and Goofing Off The 2 types of attention; Lets get real about attention; Attention training without tears? (SBP to the rescue); Savoring; Gratitude: the super strength builder; Goofing off is good. There. I said it.CH 6: Mindfulness A brief definition of mindfulness; Bare attention: the heart of mindfulness; The proven rewards of mindfulness; Mindful parent, mindful child; Exercises for a mindful mind-setCH 7: Self-Control Self-control defined; The connection between self-control and attention; The roots and the reach of self-control; The top 4 self-control sappers; How strength focus helps the development of self-controland vice versa; 5 strength-based strategies for building and sustaining self-controlCH 8: Communication The high price of harsh words; The praise puzzle; Introducing strength-based praiseCH 9: Strength-Based Living in the Real World Discipline and shame versus guilt; Seeing behavioral challenges from a strengths perspective; 5 questions for diagnosing strength breakdowns; Putting strength-based discipline into practice; Use the 3 Ps to work with weaknesses; Shifting the trajectory: the game-changing gifts of strength-based parentingCH 10: Strong Selves, Strong Families, Strong Communities, Strong World Strength-based strides in education; Strength-based strides in business; Toward a strength-based society; Let it begin with youIMHO, this is one of the most important and worthwhile books on parenting out there, along with books like Michael Thompsons Best Friends, Worst Enemies: Understanding the Social Lives of Children. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book; that wont happen, but you can make it happen for your family, at least.3 of 3 people found the following review helpful. We Are Hard-Wired to Find FaultsBy PamI really like this book and it popped up on my radar at the right time because we've got two kids in High School and I've found myself becoming more terror-struck about their futures than ever.What I mean about 'terror-struck' is really old-fashioned worrying. Basically because, while they are smart, they are entirely unlike their dad and I, people who were always science/Tech/math oriented... and the paper after article has sort of inundated and propagandized we parents to believe the only road to fiscal happiness stems from the sciences.The Result of this is that I'm a drag to be around. And I to often fall into the trap of trying to fix the areas of shortcoming that I perceive in my kids. Lea Waters has convinced me that this is the wrong approach. And actually, the stupid approach. She did this by pointing out that we are hard-wired to find the flaws in things, people, and situations. It's sort of ingrained into us by evolution. And this flaw-finding though doesn't help people to find where they excel.So I'm dumping the 'flaw approach' to look for areas where my kids excel.Interjected Thought: One reason it is so easy for me to abandon my old approach is because of my daughter's friends parents. This girl's dad actually stood over her while she was taking her drivers license test, and when she missed a question (one question) this poor child was grounded for the rest of the semester.Geesh. I don't want to be that hard-nosed. That doesn't do anything helpful. Being an older mom I've seen children like that become extremely successful... but they are are frequently nervous adults who are never as happy as I would want my children to be.There are examples and approaches outlined in the book. This approach was initially used in the author's business consulting. She then took it Australian schools where it's been improved and modified for parents.